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Monday, August 31st, 2015 06:17 am
Thursday, Christine wrote:

Our farewell to Mr. Montague was a precious, peaceful, painless, utterly trusting one around 10:30am (PT) this morning. ... His was an attentive, caring, fiercely protective, and noble soul. We are so grateful that we were able to provide him with this final gesture of our love and respect.

We drove up into the mountains to deliver him [to the potter who also does pet cremations], and then down to the sea for a few hours where we could hear the ocean purr and our salty tears fell amidst tide pools of memories; our cries were answered by sea birds on the wing who could miraculously lift our hearts onto the breeze, all of us together -- for a moment -- again.


Thank you all for your expressions of sympathy and condolences. They mean a great deal.

Friday we started talking about Edward. He's pretty much run wild the past handful of months as Christine hasn't had the heart to say "no" or ignore him when he asks to go out. I found a website about cat training (not all of which seemed appropriate for our situation), and we negotiated from there. We've started a practice of carrying him out to a bench in the little yard area near our unit, holding him and chatting with him, before we return in leaving him there. We are going to the same place to collect him. We've talked with the neighbors where he hangs out and asked them not to feed him. So that's been some distraction, especially while he's inside, trying to retrain us to let him out.
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Wednesday, August 26th, 2015 07:14 am
This morning i found in my Associate Clerk inbox a letter from the clerk of NCYM-FUM, the North Carolina Yearly Meeting of Friends that aligns itself with the anti-universalist branch of the Society of Friends (Friend United Meeting). He writes that three meetings have been released from their membership in that Yearly Meeting. Two (Poplar Ridge and Holly Spring) because they were involved in funding the formation of a new yearly meeting and one (New Garden) because it holds membership in another yearly meeting.

Reading a March summary from Chuck Fager (http://quakertheology.org/Preview-QT-26-03-01-2015.pdf), my interpretation of the action of North Carolina Yearly Meeting-FUM is this:

* Poplar Ridge is almost indistinguishable from a Baptist Church;
* Polar Ridge's pastor wanted to reduce the theological diversity of NCYM-FUM by insisting that all Meetings be aligned with NCYM-FUM and no other Quaker bodies.
* New Garden is the meeting most targeted because it is in fellowship with the more liberal branches of Friends "New Garden Friends Meeting is an inclusive, welcoming Christian faith community. Our members and attenders represent a wide range of religious backgrounds and traditions. Grounded in more than 250 years of Quaker heritage, New Garden remains a vital Meeting for those who seek that of God in every person." [Code word inclusive means they welcome LGBTQ members.]
* Poplar Ridge's attempt to dominate the Yearly Meeting business by demanding unity in theological stance has been incredibly divisive.
* The Yearly Meeting executive body, witnessing that Poplar Ridge had finally crossed a line in beginning exploration of starting a new Yearly meeting, had grounds to release Poplar Ridge and its financial partner Holly Spring before the gathering of the whole where the dissent and tumult would be even more charged. Unfortunately, by applying this particular judgement of a line to the disruptive and demanding meetings, they needed to equally apply it to the more universalist meeting that maintained a membership in a second yearly meeting.

So, i read this as a trimming of two extremes from the Yearly Meeting.

Ah, here's Chuck's more up-to-date blog post: http://afriendlyletter.com/breaking-carolina-bombshell-three-nc-meetings-expelled-will-it-stand/

It seems my reading aligns with his.

I'll note that were i to move to North Carolina i *might* sojourn with a North Carolina Yearly Meeting
(Conservative) meeting, but i could not join one. I would not be interested in any meeting that was aligned with NCYM-FUM -- except with the possibility of the expelled New Garden Friends Meeting. I'd be more at home at a Meeting that was part of Piedmont Friends Fellowship and Yearly Meeting. I've happily joined Friends at the Chapel Hill Friends Meeting in the past.
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Monday, August 24th, 2015 05:11 pm
In more selling off the china news (I suppose this is tedious to read about, but it's a bit of an adventure for me):
Read more... )
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Saturday, August 22nd, 2015 07:26 am
Housing ponder for this morning: East Oakland, just really how much crime are we talking about? (It's remarkable how many houses for sale in the low budget end are available.) I'll note that we are looking for houses that won't require a dramatic change in our housing budget. Between the crazy upsurge in the past few years and our budget landlord, we are comparatively spoiled for housing costs.

This morning Mr M has left his corner to come join us on the bed. This is so remarkable after weeks of his hiding in nooks. He's been sitting on my chest purring away. Such a delightful gift. Meanwhile his spine and legs seem simply skeletal.

I signed onto skillshare yesterday for a free sketching tutorial (Digital Drawing Workout: The Art of Subtraction). It was a pleasant diversion. There are also food photography tutorials which seem likely to align with my china shoot needs. The system is offering three months for 99¢, so i went ahead for the trial. It's not my preferred mode for learning, but it may provide the inspiration needed to pull off the etsy sales photos. (I also think there seem to be plenty of similar tutorials on youtube; the difference is there is theoretically a learning community at skillshare.)

This morning i've a planning meeting for a visioning process for Meeting. I'm trying to get in the right mind frame for it: the reading i've been doing just doesn't fit. I suppose thinking about moving and the elephant issues have not helped. I'm preoccupied with how to find sustainability day to day: i've not been thinking about helping the Meeting find such sustainability.
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Friday, August 21st, 2015 12:43 pm
This morning i am imagining life in Concord, CA. Transit.511.org helps me estimate what the commute would be like on public transit: over two hours one way. It's mostly on BART, one of the area rail systems, and so it could be useful time for reading and writing. Wikitravel makes me laugh:
Concord is located 29 miles east of San Francisco, meaning that the commute through the Caldecott Tunnel and across the Bay Bridge can be done in approximately thirty minutes when traffic is light, and in less than a week when traffic is heavy.
Would a two hour ride be better than a one hour drive? (Especially when the one hour is so uncertain?) I imagine four hours of reading the interwebs and writing twice a week might be pleasant. (Admittedly this is with the rose filter on at maximum strength.)

The linens arrived for the china sets. This means this weekend can be spent in photographing pieces. I'm still trying to decide how many place settings for the dining set that includes the serving dish: six or four? I'm convinced the tea set should be for six. And, it's time to commit to the second attempted replacement tea pot.

Edward has coming home during the day, twice now Hurrah! His regular presence and comfort staying inside certainly reduces Christine's worry.
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Monday, August 10th, 2015 06:18 am
Lessee.

I took Friday off for Mental Health. We drove straight over the Santa Cruz mountains on tiny windy roads, myself at the wheel, no rush. Lunch in Pescadero, not at famous Duarte's (thirty minute wait) but at the Country Store restaurant up the street. Then to Bean Hollow State Beach where we meditated on the waves and i visited tide pools.

I've bid on two sets of gold flatware to go with the china. One set is won, and that will cover the tea set and the six settings without tea cups. Another set looks to be almost won at a sweet agreeable price. I've bought the matching linens. Soon the fashion photography will begin.

It looks like mis-matched china teasets are going for hundreds of dollars on etsy. Hopefully, the additional elements i'm adding will get the premium price i am hoping for.

I didn't attend Meeting but did some research on visioning process for Meeting as well as some discussions about elephant herding with Christine.

Work starts in fifteen minutes with conference calls for a standards group outside work.

Before we begin the home buying process in earnest here in California, i believe i will be asking my directory and manager whether i could keep my job if we moved to NC. This sort of timing issue would be gone then, and we wouldn't be buying on the Hayward fault (and probably within reach of sea level rise).
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Friday, August 7th, 2015 07:09 am
Wonderful evening with two rain showers, a few flashes of lightning, and distant rolls of thunder. The heady scent of summer rain: if i hadn't been back east and caught in downpours in Tampa, i would have found it even more magical.

Summer rain is so very very rare here, even when it's not a drought.

Reading the twitter hashtag on the GOP debate depressed me. Admittedly, my sense of cheer is at a distance due to some concerns that i am carrying.
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Saturday, July 4th, 2015 07:29 am
AWOL again (where i'm the one who grants leave).

I disappeared into reading another stack of space opera books for a couple of days. I know i'm escaping, i know what i am escaping: i suppose this is a sign i should try and find a therapist to talk to. The goal would be the coaching that i seem to not be managing on my own right now.

On the other hand, i wonder if i can motivate myself with the 120-90 minute a week budget that therapy would take (Transit time, included). meta talking to myself )

--==∞==--

We watched the movie Mr Turner last night. There's a review at IMDB that faults the movie for being "a series of largely disjointed vignettes." It's true it misses a driving narrative. When is life truly a driving narrative? We are taught to value the narrative, to see the pattern of the narrative among the random, but as we live our life the threads are so interwoven with other stories, there is no actual narrative. Narrative is the pattern we find as we sift all that is for what to attend to.

The movie's disjointed moments of low and high portray the common, eccentric, and sublime without guiding the viewer: i am reminded of the effect of some of Turner's paintings. They were so abstracted, yet intended a narrative (with titles such as "The Fighting Temeraire tugged to her last berth to be broken up, 1838 " and "Slavers Throwing overboard the Dead and Dying—Typhon coming on"). In this movie, too, we have abstracted moments from the last half of Turner's life intended to provide the narrative.

It's available streaming on Amazon.
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Tuesday, June 23rd, 2015 06:23 am
A pleasant visit with my brother last night, despite his late arrival. (I'm not proud that i'm keeping score: let it go.) There was a small circus around the inflatable mattress. In the wait for his arrival i inflated it.... and then found it deflated. Clearly i hadn't sealed the two ports. So, again i inflate, again it deflates. Knowing it is a definition of insanity, i inflated it again as my brother was ready for bed. Voila! The hole was right near where his head was, and we were able to seal it up.

N thought MacGyver would disapprove of my blue duck-brand duct tape, but i think it is perfectly acceptable.

He was off, apparently, only after some few hours of sleep to work jet-lagged in a 24 hour taqueria near the airport.

He advised me to get on the phone and fuss at United over their "inability" to assign me seats on my flight from Tampa to SFO via Newark. It was a thirty minute call just to find out that, indeed, they are "unable" to assign me seats due to the same flight number on both sides of the connection despite the change of planes. Presumably, if i do nothing, i will show up at the airport, and will be waiting for the folks who are trying to upgrade their seats to move to better ones. I'm trying to decide which will be more distressing. Minimally an hour hassling airline staff by phone when i could be doing something at home, or being pissed off at the airport when i would just be waiting around at the airport. I expect the airline to be required to get me to SFO somehow. ... and Hipmunk shows that there will still be flight choices from United from Tampa to SFO and from Newark to SFO. So, worst case they put me on a later flight. I'm still indignant that i have this complication.

I'm wondering if i get a first class upgrade out of this, wondering if being the pleasant but distressed passenger ends up being rewarded over the jerk. Or if it's the Yes-I-AM-entitled-I-paid-for-a-ticket behavior that wins.
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Friday, June 12th, 2015 07:28 am
I'm going to get to attend the American Librarian Association meeting in San Francisco at the end of the month. I'll go up with a friend and colleague on Friday and knock around, and then Saturday i have a schedule of meetings and events about privacy to attend.

I'm hoping it will be fun and not too overwhelming.

We finally have warm days. Monday was downright HOT, and it seemed unfair to be thrown into the furnace after so many mild days. Today is simply going to be pleasantly warm, but the power company is calling for a saving day where we should reduce our power. We did have a drizzly day on Wednesday: so delightful, so needed. Tonight i hope to sit on the deck and enjoy a balmy evening into the night.

We watched the documentary series The Century of the Self over the past few weeks. It shows how propaganda, public relations, and advertising developed over the century. Intentionally, Americans were encouraged to focus on their desires and fears over the century, and one can easily see so much of what is problematic - the waste, the over-consumption, the lack of concern for others and lack of civic-mindedness - as a result. We're also watching the Roosevelt documentary, and it does provide a sense of the difference, the before. Corporate greed was well entrenched, but the progressive spirit of both Teddy Roosevelt and FDR was well connected to the progressivism of the culture. I can't imagine what the Tea Party would brand Teddy Roosevelt. (I'll admit a certain ... squeamishness around his attitude toward the constitution.)

I'm left with questions of how well can i guard myself against the self satisfaction culture.

Elephants are coming and going. Some days feel like a stampede and then some days it seems they are gone. My record-keeping failed in the past weeks when it seemed my brain went on a long vacation to Liad as i read book after book, so it's hard for me to verify my perceptions.
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Thursday, June 4th, 2015 06:45 am
I've been lost in the Liaden Universe's Agent of Change series since Monday afternoon. I bought Mouse And Dragon and when that was done i tore through four of the five stories following. I believe i read these first when i spent a trance like week at a conference in Vancouver over the summer solstice weekend. The daylight and the books had me reading late into the twilit night. The books are threads of narratives woven together and i seem to have remembered some thread better than others. I think i may not have read Conflict of Honors so much of the subsequent narrative of those characters was ignored.

So, just reading and fuzzily going about work for the past 60 hours. (I'll note that Tuesday had an early all staff presentation and Wednesday an extremely early meeting which has also scrambled my schedule.)

So, trying to reenter after the clerking retreat.... and i'm hoping what i learned at the clerking retreat hasn't been too subsumed by the practices of Liaden melant'i.
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Friday, May 15th, 2015 06:28 am
Why is it when i read these folks want a common sense approach, i think it means "Not in my back yard and don't spend any of my tax dollars."

I've read the internet this morning, and Christine seems to be resting quite well. I'm looking at my ticklers for this mid month point and find a reminder to re-read this contrast of the harm of too much praise and the need for validation and encouragement.

With the OVER HALF INCH of rain yesterday, perhaps it is the clean air. I feel refreshed and ready to take on the day. Maybe it was actually walking before bed. I'm ready for a good Friday and good weekend.
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Tuesday, May 12th, 2015 07:03 am
Wow.

I've been using the Moodscope tool for six months or so now. It seems a trivial tool and i feel like i'm answering the questions the same way... yet the score moves. I'd been in a mood decline over the past few days (where decline means going to the all time average score level: my scores before the job change seem to average below 50% while i now seem to average at just under 60%*). Today i've perked up. And i think that's because yesterday, not only did i do the filling the form exercise, but i also looked back at my serenitree plans for my 47th year. [Accidental post at this point in writing.] I reconnected with that visioning and dreaming exercise, and found it more clear as to what i am trying to do.

And, i did get my tiny "condition of enoughness" goals done. Beyond that, while i didn't get in a walk, i did get a load of laundry and i knitted while watching our evening diversion. Plus, Christine and i had a long lovely chat on the deck, a habit we've been developing that i adore. (Although there was a six month period where we would have some walks when i came home that were twice rewarding.)

It's nice to have a data measure that enforced my impression that i was swinging up yesterday evening. Looking back over the past few months and seeing i had been progressing in going though stuff and that there were household care issues that had actually been improved.

If Moodscope allowed a csv export of the raw scores, i could actually calculate the averages before and after certain dates. But no. If paying for it allowed data export, i'd be interested.
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Sunday, May 10th, 2015 08:55 am
Rough morning for us.

I woke to very bad dream about my parents. It wasn't too early to get up, so i tried calling Mom to wish her a happy Mother's Day. No answer. I have a slight sense of disturbance that lingers, that will be better once i hear their voices.

I then messed about in the kitchen, preparing a vegetarian dinner loaf. I tried using the grinder on the nuts: too small an amount to make it through the grinder. When the chickpeas were done, i pushed them through, pushing out the pecans: in general, too much fuss for the effort. I think i'll just use the potato masher in the future. The (very very old, back of cabinet) quinoa cooked up with much more volume than expected. I thought i was being clever by steaming the loaf: i was not.

It tastes pretty good, at least, but even after having been in the oven in a pie plate for 25 min, it has the texture of refried beans. I suppose it will get me through the week.

Christine is having her own bumps.

Yesterday I took a friend for an MRI: that ran over long, as it hadn't started by the time i came to pick her up. I then saw my friend DP, who has moved to Seattle as it is less expensive there. She is in town to visit her mother who has dementia. She's coping with depression since her move away, and coping with her mother's decline.

I'm clerking both worship & meeting for business today. I feel tired.
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Friday, May 8th, 2015 06:18 am
Another 7:30 staff briefing, but this one i can attend in pajamas via webex.

Yesterday was a lovely workday. I focused, then took a break, and then focused again. It was a pleasant intensity, a flow state.

We had showers, too, lovely rain. Not enough to accumulate at the bottom of a bucket, but i suspect some plants were happy for the damp. This morning dawns bright and clear.

I knooked -- knitting with a hook -- in the evening. This project is essentially a practice project with lace-weight, a skein bought for me as a gift. I didn't take the time to run it up in a ball, and i'm glad i didn't, because there are bunches of loose ends that i see now. I don't know how the yarn broke, or was cut, or... I ponder whether the gift was purchased from a remainder table. Meanwhile, my knitting is uneven and before i start doing lace patterns with lace-weight i wanted to get a rhythm. I'm beginning to have that, learning to knit much more loosely than i naturally want to so that i can manage to insert the hook on the next row.

It wasn't on the "to do" list, but it was a doing and not merely staring at a screen (although i've discovered that Lost Girl has two full seasons i haven't watched).

Off to try and set some more goals.
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Thursday, May 7th, 2015 11:49 am
Yesterday we needed to be in the office at 7:30 for a "Town Hall" meeting for the technology division. Not really a "Town Hall" meeting, as "Town Hall" implies questions from the community. I'm not sure what warranted an all-staff meeting, but whatever. We were there. I brought cream cheese, French bread, orange juice, and strawberries. No one indulged during the presentation but myself. Ah well. Someone did thank me afterwards, as they indulged mid-morning.

I was home early, a bit out of sorts because i hadn't gone out for lunch. I ended up distracting myself with SUV shopping. At the moment, i believe the Subaru Forester to be the most efficient high-clearance vehicle that i'd be interested in. On the other hand, it only tows a couple thousand pounds and Tumbleweed Tiny Home RVs need 3/4 to 1 ton trucks with tens of thousands of pounds towing capacity. (Looking at floor plans and the "barn raising" options distracted me this morning.)

I complained about my Very Expensive (to me) Tunisian crochet hooks kit last week, i believe. I took a pencil sharpener to the smallest one last night, barely trimming it. It's made a huge difference, and i happily completed a couple of rows.

Today is a gloriously empty schedule work day. I probably need to set my goals pretty clearly for the day. As far as goal setting goes, i'm not thrilled: i am still having a challenge with after work non-productivity and early morning distractibility. The time to deal with elephants also impacts my goal setting:
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Thursday, April 30th, 2015 01:16 pm
Other than the hummingbird....

I returned from Lake County, California in love. I didn't see much of the county, but it felt mountainous and rural, with a pleasant mix of agriculture and wild spaces. It was not terribly far away, and it didn't feel like it was remote and cut off. Zillow and some math revealed that for the same amount as the rent we pay now, i could get a tiny rented room near the office, commute four times a week, and we could pay the mortgage on over an acre with a decent small house. (Basically, i spent one evening and the next morning looking at economic statistics, zillow, zoning regulations, etc.)

Next step: a trip with Christine there.

The training over the weekend was how to scientifically collect plants to be used as specimens for two projects. I've a stack of photos to go through and three different lupines in the fridge. I can't identify to what species another patch of lupines belong from the photo -- that was another evening gone. I was a bit intimidated about the scientific collection with the crowd: i think i need quiet to record data etc.

The other stretch of California i've recently fallen in love with, the Panoche Hills, is in the opposite direction from Lake County's creeks and lakes: it's a patch of desert and near-desert landscape. That's where i'm planning on doing my collecting. I'm very much looking forward to it. Paperwork comes first: i need a permit from the BLM.

I am ... moody ... in an odd way. Part of it is that the land and plant thoughts are not what i am supposed to be doing. What i am supposed to be doing is pleasant enough, but, oh, it is not where my passion is. So there's guilt for being distracted, a bit of blues over whether i would ever be able to devote all my energy to these passions, a sense of procrastination paralysis (again).

Meanwhile, i bought very nice crochet tools (hooks with highly engineered cable attachments, and a nice hard plastic cable) and have found the crochet hook knitting to be harder with the stiff cable instead of the fiber cords. I'm thinking if i sand down the tip of the hook to a point, it may be easier to lift the lace-weight yarn off the cord.
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Saturday, April 18th, 2015 06:46 am
on retreat.

Much of the week had the sense of procrastionation-paralysis. I didn't want to spend time sorting out my to do lists because that seemed just like more procrastination, but when i finally did, my mind cleared and what i needed to focus on became obvious. I can hope it was the action of working on the list, but i have a suspicion it was something before that.... It may have been talking about how i was feeling with Christine and her assistance in getting me through a few steps (laundry and a walk).

At work i was poking at learning some things like Linked Data concepts. Friday morning my Boss had questions for me and, after answering, i mentioned i would take off work early in the afternoon to prepare for this trip. "Take the whole day as a comp day" he said, which was wonderfully sweet. Admittedly, i showed up for the team meeting, but i did appreciate taking the time to get things done, including some extra things.

The retreat theme is Practice and Play, and last night we played games. We were terribly few, and there were a few physically challenged folks. It took the coordinator a moment to really surrender her plans, but she eventually did. Presumably, many more folks will show up this morning.

I'm stopping now to make words with marker on construction paper for a mind-map. I'm hoping for some fun as people get tangled in yarn linking the words together. I HOPE the tape holds.

I hope your weekeends go well!
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Monday, April 13th, 2015 07:18 am
Yesterday i clerked my second Meeting for Business and, due to last minute scheduling shifts, i also attended our Worship and Ministry committee. I am trying to acknowledge my cranky feelings without dwelling too much in them: the clerk of the Worship and Ministry committee can't seem to manage the agenda task. I was happy the Clerk of Meeting could join us as he too could note that, yes, our committee was given a charge back in January or February and it wasn't just i as nag.

The next layer of grumpy was the couple persons who, having been given opportunity over MONTHS to contribute to retreat planning and have say, became all brainstormy and enthused about new ideas. I'm sorry but it's a week away and where were you when we had our planning calls and the months of discussions.

Similarly, one person who had had a chance to edit the State of the Meeting report via email, then in the early Worship and Ministry meeting, waited to have ideas during the Meeting for Business where editing as we go is not best practice for our community.

Amazingly, someone i respect praised my patience after meeting. I wonder about whether i would have this composure if i was still managing at work: I have so much feedback about how harsh i was as a manager. I know the harshness was the effect of years of stress, nonetheless it's hard not to frame it as failure. I remind myself that i held things together over the years of insane management, and if i was intimidating and oppressive, the team was being protected from stuff that is no longer going on.

Meeting for Business was very short, and a friend remarked on the shortness when i clerk. I think i have just been fortunate to have non-issues in the past two business meetings: surely issues will come forward as time moves on and i move to the role of Clerk.

--==∞==--

Between committee meeting and Meeting for Business, my worship led me to reflect on what's next for Christine and i (settling here or not, my work life), and i feel led to be as open as i possibly can be to alternatives to the expected. I suppose i was somewhat affected by Salmon Fishing in the Yemen, and the vision of pursuing something that made my heart leap. The delight of thinking about forestry management on Friday, leads me to ask how can Christine and i find roles as very middle-aged sedentary persons that allow us to get involved with biodiversity in any of a number of ways?

I reflected back to a series of visions i had over ten years ago. The Divine gave me a huge seed (perhaps more a rhizome or corm) and told me that this was my happiness to plant in my garden. I remember the hesitation and fear i had: what if it ran rampant and took over everything? I distrusted, i was concerned about my control, my decisions and choices. And i overcame that fear and planted it. Over the years i've been aware that i have let that garden get trampled and apparently destroyed, but as soon as i take care, the happiness plant (some sort of lily) sprouts up green again. It persists and now cannot be eradicated.

Providence has given me glimpses of possibilities, of happinesses in work and life, and i know i need to be open to stepping out into the unknown. I think i'm slowly emerging from the deep rut, and so i will have a chance of seeing myself other possibilities. How to get there.....
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Wednesday, April 8th, 2015 06:59 am
Last night we watched the documentary on James Cameron's expedition to the bottom of Challenger Deep of the Mariana Trench. There were critters and, while the camera gazed lovingly at them for moments, the narrative quickly skipped over any details. The focus was on the expedition itself, which was interesting from an engineering project management point of view and from a human interest point of view. Project management: really? You schedule the ship to arrive before the submersible is ready? Oh to have the edited footage that the scientists analyzed for critters and just gaze at the depths for an hour or so!

So.

Does the website from National Geographic link to scientific papers about the trip? No. Are there papers? Yes. I read the paper about the community patterns last night. I found the microbial mats paper this morning. There were also big -- giant! -- amoeba called xenophyophores - i hope to find a paper on them.

I delight in Google Image search as an assist when reading that scientists prior to the trip "identified several distinctive features that characterize hadal communities including a) dominance of certain groups like the actinians, polychaetes, isopods, amphipods, echiurids, and holothurians, b) lower representation of non-holothurian echinoderms, c) insignificance or lack of fish and decapod crustaceans and d) mass-occurrence of holothurians at maximal trench depths."

I'm realizing that these days i read fewer books but delight in reading various science papers as topics catch my interest. Instead of book lists, i now use Zotero to collect the citations for both the professional documents and my diversionary reading. A browser plug in, Lazy Scholar, helps me find full text on occasion, although this morning i note that it can't find the full text of the paper presented in full on the Science Direct website. I will blame Elsevier (which always produces a satisfying sense of self righteousness).

Off i go to day two of the internet identity workshop, hoping to return this evening not feeling exhausted by the pressure of so many people talking and presenting myself as a competent being. I am tired of feeling so tired, which does seem a depression symptom.

Cameron, James. Deepsea Challenge. National Geographic Entertainment, 2014.

Gallo, Natalya D., James Cameron, Kevin Hardy, Patricia Fryer, Douglas H. Bartlett, and Lisa A. Levin. “Submersible- and Lander-Observed Community Patterns in the Mariana and New Britain Trenches: Influence of Productivity and Depth on Epibenthic and Scavenging Communities.” Deep Sea Research Part I: Oceanographic Research Papers 99 (May 2015): 119–33. doi:10.1016/j.dsr.2014.12.012.

Munroe, Munroe. Lakes and Oceans. Webcomic, April 9, 2012. http://xkcd.com/1040/large/.

Nunoura, Takuro, Yoshihiro Takaki, Miho Hirai, Shigeru Shimamura, Akiko Makabe, Osamu Koide, Tohru Kikuchi, et al. “Hadal Biosphere: Insight into the Microbial Ecosystem in the Deepest Ocean on Earth.” Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences 112, no. 11 (March 17, 2015): E1230–36. doi:10.1073/pnas.1421816112.