elainegrey (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
elainegrey) wrote2011-11-09 06:34 am
elainegrey) wrote2011-11-09 06:34 am
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I'm tempted to cast on to my knook this morning and fiddle with knitting in the round. But what about the g'zillion other projects sitting around? So i think i'll keep the scarf on the knitting loom project next to me during my work at home today and see if i can encourage myself to pace myself through the morning by doing a row or two.
Now that the most recent work "crisis" is mostly over, i find myself exhausted by the morning meetings and unproductive in the afternoon. Talking to my previous boss yesterday over a long lunch, i realized the shame/guilt/anger is what is blocking me, in part. All the things i feel i ought to have done and didn't because of the work "crisis" don't go away and the behind-ness feels like it's my fault. I ought to have managed better! But that thinking isn't framed right.
I can see that this pattern is here and in my personal life, where i am coming out of the flat dullness of a depressive low. Coming out of the flat dullness, i have a stack of "ought to have dones" staring at me, and again i get caught up in a cycle of shame/guilt/frustration.
Good things to work on.
Now that the most recent work "crisis" is mostly over, i find myself exhausted by the morning meetings and unproductive in the afternoon. Talking to my previous boss yesterday over a long lunch, i realized the shame/guilt/anger is what is blocking me, in part. All the things i feel i ought to have done and didn't because of the work "crisis" don't go away and the behind-ness feels like it's my fault. I ought to have managed better! But that thinking isn't framed right.
I can see that this pattern is here and in my personal life, where i am coming out of the flat dullness of a depressive low. Coming out of the flat dullness, i have a stack of "ought to have dones" staring at me, and again i get caught up in a cycle of shame/guilt/frustration.
Good things to work on.