elainegrey | (no subject)

Just spent a couple hours running my self through "let's buy a house, now" with a "look, this will be easy" and then a "woah, there, that advice page wasn't complete" and "Oh, first, put money *there* for five years."

Well that was emotionally draining, unplanned, and unexpected. However, i think the first point will be talk to a financial advisor because it's still possible loosing a big chunk of my retirement money now in exchange for owning a home when i retire might be a responsible decision.

Then there's the whole question of staying in the SF Bay Area: discernment on purpose first, decision about house next.

(But wow, i just blew through a great deal of discernment energy.)

--==∞==--

So yesterday i did passing well with my commitments. I forgot antidepressants and had a major slowdown by 2:30 pm: coffee helped. We went out to dinner with friends somewhat spur of the moment (despite our agreement to have dinner together the last Friday of the month), and i had my rough budget for tortillas and some chips. I hadn't really committed to whether alcohol falls under this sugar & starch discipline or not. Without a commitment, i had a mango mojito.

We had the most bizarre waiter, though, who seemed to insist we have a party. He had the restaurant servers do the happy birthday chant for me, and then he brought us unordered desert with a candle. We all had a few bites, giving in on the desert denial. Random birthday festivities on a Friday night. A little strange, but we rolled with it.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Phew! Sounds like quite a day.

The buy-a-house decision proved to be a good one for me. I'm on track for a rent free retirement, with the mortgage paying off before I reach retirement age. But I bought at a time when prices in the valley were screwy in an unusual way - my mortgage payments were approx. the same amount as I expected to pay for renting a rather smaller place. Of course I did buy a fixer-upper, older than my mother. And I love the valley, with little desire to retire to the heaps of snow I grew up with. So my only really worry was putting every cent I had [except tax-sheltered retirement money], and some I didn't quite have yet into the down payment - I wiped out my contingency fund and the signing bonus for my job - the latter not quite mine in the sense that I had to stay 12 months or repay it when I left. And I was really clear that I wanted a dog eventually - and that rentals in the valley weren't going to be OK with that. Mostly they weren't even OK with the cat I arrived with.

You sound a LOT more ambivalent, both in terms of what you want and in terms of the financial choices available. You are also quite likely older than I was when I made that decision - i.e. less time to pay off the mortgage. My only advice would be to move slowly, and don't let yourself be stampeded - particularly by anyone who has a financial interest in selling houses.

The whole spur of the moment thought was looking at how rent and mortgage would be about the same amount. But, yes, i am ambivalent.

We bowed out of the arrangement to meet with a buyer's agent. First, i need to sort out my goals, then get financial advice, then consider the house issue.