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...and i spoke too soon. Yesterday, i was awakened at 5:20 to a production problem stemming from Sunday's quarterly software install. That pushed me through the day to 4:30 when i had a 20 minute consult with Career Coach Ms Purpose Clarity. Oh YAY. She sounds just the thing, PLUS so much more affordable, PLUS the outcomes sound reasonable as opposed to impossibly good. She says she's done networking for introverts and recasts it as research, not using the dread "networking" word. She is aware of the type coaching i might need through that process. We talked for over forty minutes.
So, twelve hours of work focus and a bit of obsessive crochet with the delightful Jojoland Rhythm [an evernote entry with some sample images]. Since this is just endless single crochet it was perfect to do during some of the meetings. It's far more rewarding than the usual spiraling of single crochet, because i'm wondering what color changes the yarn will go through next.
After i got off the call there were some errands left over from the weekend: jumping the dead battery in my car, returning the second set of jumper cables (as we have one set somewhere in a closet already), and the groceries. Home for a salad dinner and a mystery, and the day was very much over.
I wake this morning to find a late night message from my primary care provider in response to my query for antibiotics. "It certainly sounds like it might be time. I will send in a prescription for augmentin.'
Tonight I'll need to prepare for a nominating committee meeting on Wednesday; i have another committee meeting on Thursday night (as well as my call with "Mikey"). I'm happy to note that it seems these antidepressants are carrying me well through this. It's good to feel more capable. It's hard to connect with the despair i was feeling in November, but i know it was there, an undercurrent of questioning why to continue living. I am glad the MacBoy therapist was there when i needed him, even if the encounters with him were not the cognitive work i wanted, the unpacking of thought patterns that i know push me down into the spiral.
I am thankful i am feeling so much better.
--==∞==--
I forgot to post this morning. Today has also felt like a relay race with triage steps. It's not after 5 on the east coast, though, so i have some quiet.
I wonder what i should do today.
So, twelve hours of work focus and a bit of obsessive crochet with the delightful Jojoland Rhythm [an evernote entry with some sample images]. Since this is just endless single crochet it was perfect to do during some of the meetings. It's far more rewarding than the usual spiraling of single crochet, because i'm wondering what color changes the yarn will go through next.
After i got off the call there were some errands left over from the weekend: jumping the dead battery in my car, returning the second set of jumper cables (as we have one set somewhere in a closet already), and the groceries. Home for a salad dinner and a mystery, and the day was very much over.
I wake this morning to find a late night message from my primary care provider in response to my query for antibiotics. "It certainly sounds like it might be time. I will send in a prescription for augmentin.'
Tonight I'll need to prepare for a nominating committee meeting on Wednesday; i have another committee meeting on Thursday night (as well as my call with "Mikey"). I'm happy to note that it seems these antidepressants are carrying me well through this. It's good to feel more capable. It's hard to connect with the despair i was feeling in November, but i know it was there, an undercurrent of questioning why to continue living. I am glad the MacBoy therapist was there when i needed him, even if the encounters with him were not the cognitive work i wanted, the unpacking of thought patterns that i know push me down into the spiral.
I am thankful i am feeling so much better.
--==∞==--
I forgot to post this morning. Today has also felt like a relay race with triage steps. It's not after 5 on the east coast, though, so i have some quiet.
I wonder what i should do today.
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