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Yesterday morning i finally closed uDIG, the geodata program. Christine and i had a quick breakfast together and then i was off to Meeting.
The queries for the month are on Integrity; i am still reflecting on the concept of "to sacrifice is to make sacred" as well as meditating on transformation (and recognizing that resting is part of transforming). I think there was a mild disgruntledness in the ministry others offered, but it's hard to know whether it reflected my disgruntledness. The person i want to be is impossible: there's clearly something about creativity and learning that can wrap me up, and if i don't feel guilty about it, it renews me. But then i want to be less of a hermit and connect with other people.... And even now, i find the myself gravitating towards a logical progression that ends with oblivion. I'm not sure what it is about the testimony we call integrity that has me pulling out the mental scalpel and paring joy away from everything. When i think of integrity, i think of becoming whole ... and i'll admit i remain very self centered and think me me me (the queries are oriented that way) not how to help others be whole, as well. I'm not sure how i got so tangled up yesterday, and i think i'll just leave the tangle there.
After Meeting we ate again, and then began out drive up to Santa Rosa, where Christine had found a motorcycle. We had started out by looking at an alternative to not repairing her scooter. The scooter is a "Chinese scooter," and we had discovered after she got it that these generic scooters had flooded the market under countless brand names, that it was very hard to find places that would work on them, that parts were not easy to get, etc. We discussed finding a used familiar brand scooter, i floated a maximum price point that seemed to make sense to me (taking into account the age of our current car and some other things), and next thing we were looking at motorcycles. Honestly, i think it's a better value.
We drove up the east bay, had some congestion crossing the bridge to San Raphel. The drive around the east bay is on heavily used eight-lane interstate through light industrial areas, malls, and sprawl. I'm calculating the drive back in my mind: dark, unfamiliar roads, following Christine on an unfamiliar motorcycle. She suggested the Golden Gate bridge for the return back: skyline drive to 280 is efficient, beautiful, and lightly traveled. And it's very familiar to both of us. I knew the bridge crossing would be congested, even without the Bay Bridge closure.
The folks we bought the bike from were comfortably familiar strangers. Karen felt like someone i'd like to get to know better. I felt a little guilt about my minimal mechanical understanding of motorcycle engines, respect for Amos's clear mechanical care and skills with the bike. It's a heavy bike, and while Christine gets the hang of it, i'll have to be there to help get it up on the center stand. It's low, and otherwise it fits her well.
I followed her back out onto 101: she struggled a bit it seemed with the shifting through the ten gears with the additional foot lever. The bridge traffic was pretty slow and became so pretty far away from the bridge. I'm pretty sure we spent an hour in that traffic, maybe longer. When i called 511 to find the driving time from Sausalitio to the bridge toll plaza it was 30 min, compared to normally five minutes.
We met up at the Beach Chalet: Christine had chosen to lane split ahead, which i knew would be the safer option for her. The wait there was thirty minutes, and she needed the break, so we watched the sun set and then had a window seat after dark. We could watch the long line of fires on the beach and see the lights of occasional passing boats. We planned a sitcom around the staff: the manager looked a bit like Kenneth Branagh.
I reflected on all the sitting around and waiting that there are people who spend a similar amount of money on a vacation day, who also spend a similar amount of waiting around, who end up with a t-shirt from a theme park at the end. Our vacation souvenir is Stephanie (Christine asked the bike's name).
While stuck in traffic though, after my iPod had run out of its very little juice, i had asked myself to be in the moment, enjoy slow progress of the Marin headlands around me. The important thing i not becoming attentive to something other than the movement of the cars around one: i passed several pairs of cars pulled off to the side, at least one pair with sheriff's vehicles. (Watching the sheriff's cars get to that point was also interesting.) I eventually turned on the radio to hear an interview with David Allen of GTD fame, talking about being in the moment, the challenge,the illusions, and that finding God is as important as buying catfood. It was such pleasant synchronicity to listen to that in the golden evening light as i inched across that great red (orange) bridge.
This morning is slow: Christine resting from the unfamiliar long ride. I'm not sure what to do with the day: to many things i wand and need to do. Will i mix dye? Will i make rice crackers? Will we get groceries done? Will i document my diet experiment? What about library committee stuff? Lingering work stuff? Wail! I will try to be in the moment.
The queries for the month are on Integrity; i am still reflecting on the concept of "to sacrifice is to make sacred" as well as meditating on transformation (and recognizing that resting is part of transforming). I think there was a mild disgruntledness in the ministry others offered, but it's hard to know whether it reflected my disgruntledness. The person i want to be is impossible: there's clearly something about creativity and learning that can wrap me up, and if i don't feel guilty about it, it renews me. But then i want to be less of a hermit and connect with other people.... And even now, i find the myself gravitating towards a logical progression that ends with oblivion. I'm not sure what it is about the testimony we call integrity that has me pulling out the mental scalpel and paring joy away from everything. When i think of integrity, i think of becoming whole ... and i'll admit i remain very self centered and think me me me (the queries are oriented that way) not how to help others be whole, as well. I'm not sure how i got so tangled up yesterday, and i think i'll just leave the tangle there.
After Meeting we ate again, and then began out drive up to Santa Rosa, where Christine had found a motorcycle. We had started out by looking at an alternative to not repairing her scooter. The scooter is a "Chinese scooter," and we had discovered after she got it that these generic scooters had flooded the market under countless brand names, that it was very hard to find places that would work on them, that parts were not easy to get, etc. We discussed finding a used familiar brand scooter, i floated a maximum price point that seemed to make sense to me (taking into account the age of our current car and some other things), and next thing we were looking at motorcycles. Honestly, i think it's a better value.
We drove up the east bay, had some congestion crossing the bridge to San Raphel. The drive around the east bay is on heavily used eight-lane interstate through light industrial areas, malls, and sprawl. I'm calculating the drive back in my mind: dark, unfamiliar roads, following Christine on an unfamiliar motorcycle. She suggested the Golden Gate bridge for the return back: skyline drive to 280 is efficient, beautiful, and lightly traveled. And it's very familiar to both of us. I knew the bridge crossing would be congested, even without the Bay Bridge closure.
The folks we bought the bike from were comfortably familiar strangers. Karen felt like someone i'd like to get to know better. I felt a little guilt about my minimal mechanical understanding of motorcycle engines, respect for Amos's clear mechanical care and skills with the bike. It's a heavy bike, and while Christine gets the hang of it, i'll have to be there to help get it up on the center stand. It's low, and otherwise it fits her well.
I followed her back out onto 101: she struggled a bit it seemed with the shifting through the ten gears with the additional foot lever. The bridge traffic was pretty slow and became so pretty far away from the bridge. I'm pretty sure we spent an hour in that traffic, maybe longer. When i called 511 to find the driving time from Sausalitio to the bridge toll plaza it was 30 min, compared to normally five minutes.
We met up at the Beach Chalet: Christine had chosen to lane split ahead, which i knew would be the safer option for her. The wait there was thirty minutes, and she needed the break, so we watched the sun set and then had a window seat after dark. We could watch the long line of fires on the beach and see the lights of occasional passing boats. We planned a sitcom around the staff: the manager looked a bit like Kenneth Branagh.
I reflected on all the sitting around and waiting that there are people who spend a similar amount of money on a vacation day, who also spend a similar amount of waiting around, who end up with a t-shirt from a theme park at the end. Our vacation souvenir is Stephanie (Christine asked the bike's name).
While stuck in traffic though, after my iPod had run out of its very little juice, i had asked myself to be in the moment, enjoy slow progress of the Marin headlands around me. The important thing i not becoming attentive to something other than the movement of the cars around one: i passed several pairs of cars pulled off to the side, at least one pair with sheriff's vehicles. (Watching the sheriff's cars get to that point was also interesting.) I eventually turned on the radio to hear an interview with David Allen of GTD fame, talking about being in the moment, the challenge,the illusions, and that finding God is as important as buying catfood. It was such pleasant synchronicity to listen to that in the golden evening light as i inched across that great red (orange) bridge.
This morning is slow: Christine resting from the unfamiliar long ride. I'm not sure what to do with the day: to many things i wand and need to do. Will i mix dye? Will i make rice crackers? Will we get groceries done? Will i document my diet experiment? What about library committee stuff? Lingering work stuff? Wail! I will try to be in the moment.
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