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Rapid notes:
* Started work a little early and was happy a 8 am call was canceled. Intense work morning before leaving.
* Took a little time off work to give DE a ride to the dentist. I called work from the parking lot for a quick meeting with B-B.
* When i made it to the office i felt drained. A cup of real tea may have helped boost me. Yay for restricting caffeine to a single morning pot of tea since this time in 2009 so i can use it as a boost when i need it.
I don't know if i'm truly less teary. I feel like i ought to be crying but i'm not. This may be hormonal. I've felt awfully tense the past handful of days (since? not sure). I think i've been in a PMS state for a little longer than usual. Fortunately FINALY the state change happened this morning, so the aspects that are hormonal should be reduced in the next 12 hours.
* long meeting in afternoon. I can see we're going to be late with some things. Couldn't really think about it last night. [See "wee hours"]
* home promptly and then erratically drove a few errands with Christine getting cat treats and cheese for dinner.
* Made yummy southern cooked crookneck squash, cherry tomatos with black olives and fresh mozzarella, and vicken patties glazed with apricot jelly & mustard for dinner while Christine did cat sitting duty. Videos and then to bed.
* Woke in the wee hours worrying about the late delivery of things and don't know how to manage that. Feeling the absence of my boss as boss: we really are more like peers now. I miss having someone to turn to. His boss seems to just want magic spread sheets.
* Also worried about holidays, how and whether i should take more time off, thought about fixing a meal for those who stay in the meetinghouse in December and just don't want to, worry what i'm going to do when Christine is in NC next week and i can't snuggle her, worry about my travel to NC and Ohio and dread being away.
* Clearly this isn't helpful at 4 am.
* Talked to Christine some this morning. She's waking earlier. It's nice. She's worried about me. I wish i wasn't worryable.
* I thought about my "trying too hard" comment yesterday (in the context, for me, of interacting with people) and i wrote three quick emails to let some folks know i was thinking of them.
Coping plans: take time to ride the bicycle during work today. Dental cleaning is a walk. Keep taking analgesics for the damn canker that formed as soon as i scheduled the dental appointment. (It was pretty inflamed yesterday evening; i tried applying the steroid.) Sit on the deck and listen to the meditation script.
* Started work a little early and was happy a 8 am call was canceled. Intense work morning before leaving.
* Took a little time off work to give DE a ride to the dentist. I called work from the parking lot for a quick meeting with B-B.
* When i made it to the office i felt drained. A cup of real tea may have helped boost me. Yay for restricting caffeine to a single morning pot of tea since this time in 2009 so i can use it as a boost when i need it.
I don't know if i'm truly less teary. I feel like i ought to be crying but i'm not. This may be hormonal. I've felt awfully tense the past handful of days (since? not sure). I think i've been in a PMS state for a little longer than usual. Fortunately FINALY the state change happened this morning, so the aspects that are hormonal should be reduced in the next 12 hours.
* long meeting in afternoon. I can see we're going to be late with some things. Couldn't really think about it last night. [See "wee hours"]
* home promptly and then erratically drove a few errands with Christine getting cat treats and cheese for dinner.
* Made yummy southern cooked crookneck squash, cherry tomatos with black olives and fresh mozzarella, and vicken patties glazed with apricot jelly & mustard for dinner while Christine did cat sitting duty. Videos and then to bed.
* Woke in the wee hours worrying about the late delivery of things and don't know how to manage that. Feeling the absence of my boss as boss: we really are more like peers now. I miss having someone to turn to. His boss seems to just want magic spread sheets.
* Also worried about holidays, how and whether i should take more time off, thought about fixing a meal for those who stay in the meetinghouse in December and just don't want to, worry what i'm going to do when Christine is in NC next week and i can't snuggle her, worry about my travel to NC and Ohio and dread being away.
* Clearly this isn't helpful at 4 am.
* Talked to Christine some this morning. She's waking earlier. It's nice. She's worried about me. I wish i wasn't worryable.
* I thought about my "trying too hard" comment yesterday (in the context, for me, of interacting with people) and i wrote three quick emails to let some folks know i was thinking of them.
Coping plans: take time to ride the bicycle during work today. Dental cleaning is a walk. Keep taking analgesics for the damn canker that formed as soon as i scheduled the dental appointment. (It was pretty inflamed yesterday evening; i tried applying the steroid.) Sit on the deck and listen to the meditation script.
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