(no subject)

I had no motivation yesterday evening, so i sat and continued crocheting on a purse for my niece while watching episode after episode of Bones.

( crochet analysis )

... Thinking about Yule gifts i just went off to search eBay for Bison fiber to make mug cosies as part of a themed Yule gift donation to https://www.americanprairie.org. There's someone selling an unspun ounce of Bison fiber for a price i'm willing to pay. I also found an affordable bit of scrap bison leather lacings.... But then i found Bison nickels turned into buttons: that's perfect. Purchased.

Of course, this too was avoidance of a sort.

I'm reminded of sonia's article on core commitments .

It's my habit to berate myself for avoiding forced commitments. I realize a great deal of what i would have wanted to say are "ongoing commitments" really are "forced commitments." My committee responsibilities to Meeting are forced, despite being motivated by the ongoing commitment to the community. Attending Meeting and Meeting for Business are ongoing commitments i take with ease.

Care for my physical health in the form of exercise is forced. Care for the state of much of the household is forced. Even correspondence with many friends and family is forced (although i have definitely found that calling my parents and sister during my morning commute has become an ongoing commitment).

So i am berating myself from avoiding all those commitments and "goofing off" all evening.

That's not a compassionate understanding, and it's not going to help me balance my behaviors.

Speaking of commitments, the work hour approaches.