(no subject)

Apparently, i was in the mood for a sermon this morning. I listened to Robert Reich's 2005 address to the Berkeley School of Public Policy. Around minute 58 he answers "What can we do" with "Blue state folks should start talking and listening to red state folks." Ah, back in the Lakeoff days.

I'm struck by his "Snap-break" narrative and the Tea Party's rise. *Sigh*

Anyhow.

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I am home, resting and relaxing, with ( still significant discomfort. )

Yesterday Mom called and i was tired and in discomfort so she went on again about her self-hypnosis solution. When she brings it up now, i feel incredibly trammeled upon, far more than is reasonable. The next time she goes into it, i think i need to have a prepared speech. "Mom, when you bring up self-hypnosis yet again, it makes me believe two things about you. First, it makes me believe that you don't pay attention to what i say to you, because i've explained several times that i follow very similar practices. Second, it makes me think that you don't believe i'm an adult who can listen, comprehend, remember, synthesize, and follow up on things on my own. Together these both hurt my heart. Your repeated failure to listen to me and to repeat things you've told me before, causes repeated hurt, and now i find myself unreasonably angry any time you mention the topic of your self-hypnosis. Perhaps you would find it more beneficial to our communication to ask me how my practices are going, inviting me to share, rather than to tell me yet again, the same thing, which reinforces my experience of you not listening to me and not trusting my ability to grow."

So that yesterday, and i'm glad i've put my finger on what makes me so impatient and frustrated. I think i can communicate that the next time it comes up, and i'll give it a go for some months before deciding to shut her out of my state of health. Shutting her out is a temptation: don't give her the opening to give the same advice, but then she'll never learn where she's failing in communication. On the other hand, it's a good retreat for me, and i can always head there if i need that shelter.

Mostly i sat around yesterday, but we did spend some of the late afternoon on another assembly step on the Billy (Ikea) bookcases for the hall. I found we had the wrong doors, did research for the right doors, discovered many comments about how hard the doors are to assemble. I have very mixed feelings. The glass doors would look spiffy, and the dust protection is super valuable. But the challenge is unappealing. Maybe in a month or so? I'll have to see how they work in the showroom.

We did get the shelf lighting in, and we just need to get the top lighting cable controlled. I could use more cable tie down brackets, i think.