(no subject)

[elainegrey]

I read* a Honor Harrington book last night (The Short Victorious War), and it was just as rewarding as i remember them being. I read a number of them back during a previous workplace challenge. This time, i felt awareness that i realize i am not managing the crap at work with the nobility Honor Harrington manages. Admittedly, the need for a chain of command in the military is rather different than the chain of command in random software development environment.

But i do want to be professional, and lately i think i've let my frustrations hang everywhere. No one admires that in Honor Harrington.

* David Weber's writing for the People's Republic characters bores me, sort of like Ayn Rand's writings when she'd give characters speeches. I feel i'm being given a lesson, and I'm not interested. I usually skim those chapters.

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I bought a knitting loom sometime back. I was first pleased with it, but now it seems likely i could be just as fast with a hook. Part of my interest in knitting is simply knowing that the knitting stitches are more economical than crochet stitches: the yarn makes a larger area fabric. But i don't want to learn to knit, really: i want my skills to develop with crochet, and it's in the edging and details, i think, that i have fun. The loom promised an even flat fabric with efficient stitching, but good heavens is it a bulky thing. On the other hand, there's a Loom kit which would allow assembling just the right size -- admittedly, a rake would do for me...

So now i see there's some practice called "knooking" with hacked crochet hooks. I'm tempted to order the set just to see if i can pick this up and use it instead of the weaving. If i understand the technique (from looking at the book in Amazon's viewer), i think i could hack other hooks for this purpose....

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I'm still recovering from yesterday's intense east coast time zone day, it seems. I pour myself out with meetings and responses, forgetting to eat (because all the times seem wrong), forgetting take my morning medications. There's no pause. Pacing, how to manage pacing?

Comments

[laughingrat]

I really feel you on the letting your frustrations hang out, and feeling like it's not admired/noble/etc. I don't know what to say about it; to me, you seem all right even when you're venting. Other people do, generally. But I too feel acutely embarrassed and ignoble when I feel like I've been burdening everyone too much with my woe, and it's not a feeling that's easy to lay to rest. :-|

[elainegrey]

I'm more fuzzy about it professionally than i am in my journal. I mean, my journal, my venting -- i'm amazed folks keep checking in, but...

But professionally, to my team? How much dis/respect do i show New Director in front of the team? I don't act, and can't pretend to admire or respect him, but i could not ooze annoyance, i suppose.

I'm pretty sure everyone knows what i think of him.

I also suspect people at the home office are far more position/hierarchy aware than California folks are. I get the occasional sense that the home office folks see boxes and boundaries that are linked to titles that we California folks don't see.