elainegrey

I was actually able to get a couple of loads of laundry done just before Meeting: Christine was left to fold. I also finished winding up the huge balls of purple cotton yarn i'd dyed for a friend.

The swift doesn't function as smoothly as i'd like. ( design notes )

Meeting was good, although self-oriented. I realized that i've "burned" away all (many of) the distracting "shoulds" in my private life. I feel mostly independent of external demands and expectations. I now have room to listen. And then, when i got to my meditation about the gift of wisdom, i felt an overwhelming sense of NOW, a sense that i am now ready to receive that "wisdom." "Wisdom" is a loaded term, and i think my expectations are not of "wisdom of Solomon" type wisdom, but correct prioritization of the moments in my life "wisdom." The Quaker term would be a state of "clearness," "being clear." (I don't think Friends often use the term "clarity" despite the dictionary reporting that the current sense of the word clarity originated in the early 17th century and Friends were formed mid 17th century. Still too newfangled a term for early Friends?)

The overwhelming sense of Now, the sense of a potential way of being that is easier, brought on a huge emotional sense of relief (and the awareness of the held back stresses). I consciously chose to step away from the experience and turned to thinking about crochet and dyeing clothes, and used that as a place of replenishment, before returning to that experience of relief. I think i was able to pace my experience to keep from being completely overwhelmed: and that too is a wonderful sense of competence, of being able to choose not to be completely washed away in emotion.

And, the moments set aside to think creatively were also productive. I came up with a design for my purple altered sweater ( notes )

I also felt inspired about another dye plan: ( dye thoughts )

Errands at meeting and errands on the way home, then lunch watching "Cake Boss," latest guilty pleasure. I ripped out the effusive purple thread work and worked up a proof of principle piece to show my design concept was possible. Called Mom and Dad, groceries, mental prep for the work day including determining my strategy and tactics for dealing with the work surprise from Friday. No exercise but felt exhausted.

Health:( details )