elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Thursday, October 22nd, 2020 06:09 am
Daily journaler is seeking other daily journalers. I'm looking for other diarists that share some aspect of their daily life, whether it's limited to a narrow aspect of creativity or concern or is wide ranging. The diarist should be open to reading my entries and ideally is already reading the entries of folks in my circle.

ETA: Diarist should have high tolerance for typos.
elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Saturday, May 28th, 2016 08:25 am
HI, long busy week. Here's Christine's last travel log entry:

Greetings from Pittsboro!

Sorry for the delay in this final entry to our travel log but after we were fortunate enough to have our truck promptly repaired in Kingdom City, MO[1] we decided to make a big push through to our destination. This took us through St. Louis, MO where we saw the famous arch in the rain and bid so long to Interstate 70 and hello to Interstate 64. A long, unexpectedly desolate, ride across across southern Illinois and Indiana ensued until we stopped for lunch in Dale, IN. Around dinner time we caught a glimpse of Louisville Slugger Park (again in the rain), crossed the Ohio River (see attached), and made our way through the Daniel Boone Forest of Kentucky to Charleston, WV by 11pm.

To the chagrin of restless felines (who were ready for the now established routine of pausing for a motel where they could have a peaceful meal and sleep in a bed) we then pushed through the night on the West Virginia Turnpike to arrive Thursday morning at 5:25am to pull into our driveway and watch the moon setting over our house. Ross and Marie Bush arrived to meet us with the keys and a hug.

After a few hours sleep, our first day in Pittsboro involved misc. security system hijinks [2] and HVAC issues but after a good night sleep we are in place for a long weekend with all major utilities back online (or offline in the case of the "security" system) as they should be.


Thanks for your support and encouragement across the country. We made it safe and sound and look forward to seeing each of you soon.

Christine & [Elaine]

"There are no dangerous thoughts; thinking itself is dangerous."
--Hannah Arendt from The Life of the Mind.

[1] We have blown out the heater and the mechanics by-passed it. Could something have gone wrong at the 11,000 Rocky Mountain pass to do that? Eventually we were overheating, not quite adding enough coolant, and limped into Kingdom City (named for Kingdom Oil, apparently). I was prepared to hear we had a blown head gasket.

[2] We triggered a fire alarm trying to understand the system, and it was still hooked up to the monitoring company. We expect the bill for the false alarm will go to the previous owners, the people of record at the alarm company. Then we had to get the previous owners to ask that the monitoring be stopped. Christine disconnected it all on Friday. I've been watching the arrest log fro the sheriff for a few weeks. Best i can tell there are dozens of invisible people who are cited for Failure to Appear.

[3] Yay the air conditioning cooled down the place! Then it stopped. All the moisture pulled out filled up some line triggering an auto disconnect. We had it back working before Friday heated back up.

I've inventoried a stack of invasive species on the property: Japanese honeysuckle, tree-of-heaven, autumn olive, and Japanese grass. While i have put in over an hour each morning in the yard, it's clear i'm calling the guy in the classifieds of the local paper to come clear the septic field and get rid of some of the large trees-of-heaven and then i'm calling the Goat Squad.

I've got my loppers and machete and will get the mower tomorrow. My sister was an angel and mowed the yard for us.
elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Sunday, May 22nd, 2016 10:12 am
We are coping fairly well. Christine’s had struggles on mornings, particularly Friday and yesterday. This morning she caught herself, and it’s been smooth.

The cats have been taking much attention. We were in heavy traffic after picking them up from The Cats’ Inn, and i wrangled them while Christine coped with traffic. All the cats seemed fascinated with the riverside footwell. Why not the passenger footwell? No, that’s BORING. 

At night, Luigi and Greycie Loo love to burrow under the covers. It’s something they would do on occasion, but now in the motel rooms it seems an obsession.

Yesterday we gave Edward and Luigi a slight dose of a sedative. It certainly seemed to help the morning out. Today only Edward gets the sedative: we’ll see if Luigi is as mellow as he was most of the drive. I think Edward needs the sedative more for the motel rooms than the truck, but we’ll see.

Donner Pass was beautiful: started seeing drifts of snow at 4000 ft, i think, then by the summit at 7,057 ft there were several inches of snow. It began to graupel for a bit (i assume if “rain”, “snow”, “sleet”, and “hail” can be verbs, so can “graupel”), and as we descended there was also some nice flaky snow. 

The Emigrant Pass in Nevada, at  6,125 feet fascinated me. These are the Emigrant Hills: what hills! Infant much of Nevada was fascinating. I saw some wildflowers: no massive displays but lovely. Oh, to ramble for a while! But we weren’t in a rambling mood, so we kept going. 

We’ve crossed Nevada and twilight was deepening into dusk as we cleared a rise and began a descent to a neon and twinkling town. West Wendover, Nevada is home for  a bunch of casinos. Wendover, Utah is home to budget motels. It’s a fascinating contrast. Bonneville flats race vehicle photos are in the hotel lobby (signed, presumably by drivers who stayed here) and in the casino’s convention center area. We’ll cross the white plain and on to Salt Lake, then drop south to avoid rain and snow. 

Hope to be in a lovely Rocky Mountain motel tonight!

Sent from my Sprint Samsung Galaxy Note5.

elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Friday, May 20th, 2016 11:57 am
Bye bye Bright blue sky

Sent from my Sprint Samsung Galaxy Note5.
elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Tuesday, May 17th, 2016 09:27 pm
A pile of purged cassette tapes. I saved some of my collaged covers and some mix tape covers that listed the contents. "How hard can grad school REALLY be" we will listen to on the drive.
elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Tuesday, May 17th, 2016 03:19 pm
Today i'm supposed to remember ... "replay"... a happy day, but that's really not what i feel like doing ... (even though i still have writing up the trip to death valley to complete).

First, i want to dump some worries:

1) I've had my first homeowner worry dreams: something about the refrigerator. I don't know why: my subconscious is missing the real worries about the dishwasher (is it really going to stay fixed?) and the clothes washer (did the sellers come take it in the middle of the night after the sale, or will they demand it in a few months? or...). The fridge is huge and shiny and new. I will learn to clean its coils, i promise!

and so on )

With luck, recording my worries will mean i don't have to think about them any more.
elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Thursday, May 12th, 2016 06:43 am
The drama about the plumbing took a different turn on Tuesday. The plumber had left the bathroom tidy and we set off into the hills to visit various vistas, Los Trancos and Russian Ridge in particular. Periodically my phone would beep with some received message but it wasn't until we pulled into the parking lot at San Gregorino State Beach that we were in signal when someone tried to call.

Dad asked, what is this about Laura finding vandalism at the house?! Our adrenaline surged and i promptly got off to call my sister -- but as i did, i realized i had texted her about the bathroom drama. It turns out she asked Mom, who didn't know about the black water and plumbing snake during the closing. Laura was exasperated: she had repeatedly explained to Mom that nothing was wrong at the new hose. I called my Dad back and let him know it was the known issue with the apartment.

What a game of telephone!

My mother's confusion -- and her certainty of incorrect information -- is part of why i am glad we are moving closer to them, and is going to be one of the challenges. I've found her to be an unreliable narrator for many years, previously predicated on the extrapolations and interpolations she would make and then treat as fact. I certainly extrapolate and interpolate, myself, but i try very hard to keep my speculations clear from the facts. Mom would impute some psychological drama to a family member and reason from there, coming to various conclusions and then treating those as fact.

Now it seems that the leaps are getting a little more wild and correction even harder. I think Mom knows this to some extent. The amount of deference to my father is novel, she is more cautious in the face of new things.

Shifting from exasperation -- from years when it seemed she almost willfully misheard or misrepresented or selectively forgot details -- to a recognition that Mom's capability is diminished is important now. My first challenge, i think, once settled, will be to get her a baseline cognitive screening.

--== ∞ ==-- Meanwhile --== ∞ ==--

I placed most of my plants out for people to take last night. My heart was heavy as i did so. All the plants look so scraggly when pulled out of context, and so many of them are volunteers or survivors -- not carefully groomed specimens.

And i need to leave my Meyer lemon tree. I read the USDA recommendations and NC plant importation rules. While i wouldn't be moving citrus from a quarantine zone, the last thing i want to do is bring something harmful to our new paradise (because it appears i will have plenty of weeds and established invasives to deal with). In particular "phytophagous snails" seem to be a concern for NC, with California a source, and i know i've got slugs in the garden and there are plenty of snails around here.

Phytophagous was a new word for me: Greek for herbivore, i guess? Hmm, "Plant" is from Latin, but "eater" seems like its good Old English.

Anyhow, my heart aches and, as i smell a lemon picked from the "tree" (very very dwarf shrub), i tear up. Christine has cried on my behalf: i feel my stoic wall go up against the feelings, i know i have little signs in my mind: "Do not enter, distressing feelings here."

I've been avoiding the deck garden for months, knowing this time would come.
elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Monday, May 9th, 2016 10:10 pm
We close on Tuesday- almost here!

Sent from my Sprint Samsung Galaxy Note5.
elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Monday, May 9th, 2016 08:41 am

Republicans also complained that Ms. Gupta and other federal officials had set an unreasonable deadline — the close of business on Monday — for a response from Mr. McCrory and the University of North Carolina, which received a similar letter.

“The legislative process doesn’t work where a response can be given by just a few days, so we’re going to move at the speed that we’re going to move at to look at what our options are at this point,” Mr. Moore said last week outside his office in Raleigh, the state capital, where he told reporters that Monday’s deadline would “come and go” without action by the General Assembly.

-- http://www.nytimes.com/2016/05/10/us/north-carolina-governor-sues-justice-department-over-bias-law.html

Remind me again how quickly this bill went from proposal to passing?

Special Session?
Filed that day?
Passed both houses and signed in same day?


elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Sunday, May 8th, 2016 07:50 pm
Bing's homepage art today [Sunday] -- an adorable photo of mama sealion and pup -- is a nod to the day without making it any more difficult for those for whom contemplation of motherhood brings grief or pain. I am thankful my maternal relationship has healed so over these past five ... eight? years. It took much work but i have such calm clear feelings when i think of my mother now....

I do wonder whether any of the sense of grief i felt earlier today had to do with my mother's betrayal in reading my journal and attempting to blackmail me with it while i was in high school. I had been thinking about bringing the journals out from the closet corner, where i had to disassemble the shelves to get at them, and into the shelves in our living room. Suddenly the thought of unsupervised family members in proximity to my journals came to mind -- and that is certainly out of the question.
elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Sunday, May 8th, 2016 11:15 am
I am feeling an odd grief. I just repacked some boxes that had all sorts of mementos from my childhood into graduate school. Random rocks, a tub of shells, letters from friends long dropped (the depression of graduate school created a rift in time). Diaries and diaries and gardening and weather journals.

I'm not sure why there's grief. Guilt is washing through, too, i suspect: i have all this STUFF. What am i going to do, reconstruct my life?

--== ∞ ==--

Reading letters to me, i recognize something similar yet different from the LJ community. There's a subtle quality of receiving something written to yourself, and i know i have not engaged that way for ages. Something blocks me from replies, a stress of sorts, should i reply to this or that or the long long list....

I wonder if i can change that with this move.

--== ∞ ==--

Worship is over at the Meeting house. I'm heading over to attend Meeting for Business.

Christine is very frustrated with the house buying process: i'm so glad it's almost over. We've not yet seen what we need to sign by proxy on Tuesday. I do expect our lawyer to get us the papers, but Christine doesn't think that's going to happen.

[I then spent time reading up on the closing process in NC. Maybe we have everything we need already, except titles and deeds?]
elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Thursday, May 5th, 2016 06:05 am
Sassafras, my new computer: I was finally able to transfer my personal data over the wifi Monday night, so i am tippity-tapping on the new machine right now. (And tippity tapping is right: the keyboard action is quite different.) I have the ethernet adapter to sort out, but it's great to have a personal machine back.

I think i have been a little more focussed this week. A architectural decision was made on Tuesday that takes some work of my team's plate. I'm disappointed but it also removes the stress of how i would specify the details in time for me to be on the road for a week. Christine's to-do list also had a particularly emotionally challenging item removed yesterday.

I don't often post about politics, particularly politicians. The issues i care about -- developing a sustainable way for all of us to share the planet with respect for all living things -- i feel i can best share by writing about my passions, and not dwelling on individuals.

But the Republican party horrifies me right now. I'm not sure how integrity has slipped so far out of favor: this, because of interviews with Trump supporters who "know Trump is just saying outrageous things" and doesn't mean them. Dr Ben Carson's lack of a grasp on the physical reality is perhaps not uncommon, but it seems a certain pointer to a disqualifying flaw. And Trump wants him to help pick a VP? (Christine is looking at the wikipedia article on the four horsemen of the apocalypse to figure out which one will be picked: she alleges Trump is Conquest.)

I did read a very helpful article that i'm sure one of you pointed out to me: http://religiondispatches.org/sympathy-for-the-devils-i-was-a-pastor-to-trump-supporters/ This has helped me understand how despair and anger can create a receptivity to the apparent message of Trump.
elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Sunday, May 1st, 2016 12:23 pm
So the data transfer failed overnight. I'm now waiting on an ethernet adapter for the new mac to facilitate the transfer. Grump.

And, while i wait, i'm upgrading the new machine to the new operating system. Why, may i ask, is the new system NOT running the new OS, oh Why?

My old computer hasn't crashed since i plugged it in and didn't move it again. Hrmph.
elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Sunday, May 1st, 2016 08:27 am
See one of the following for today's journaling about Saturday morning in Death Valley. It's partial, but it's a start of catching up.

* https://elainegrey.dreamwidth.org/606082.html
* http://elainegrey.livejournal.com/2235247.html
elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Saturday, April 30th, 2016 10:11 pm
As if i didn't have enough change in my life, i've bought a new computer. I wanted to wait until we moved but my current powerful laptop is crashing multiple times per day. I've tried the PRAM reset with no success. The laptop is a "late 2008 model" MacBook Pro so i've probably gotten a fair bit of work out of it.

I've been saving up for some time to actually buy two computers: a small laptop and a nice desktop mac for image editing. The MacBook Pro laptops seem underpowered for the price. On the other hand, the iMac would be a machine that will feel like an upgrade from my current MacBook Pro. I still really like using a laptop, though. So, i've bought the featherweight new MacBook. Two pounds. That's it. It's incredibly light. Admittedly, the screen is a little small, too, but i've been using a 13" screen for work that has similar pixel dimensions to my 15" personal computer. The new computer has the so called retina screen.

The new laptop also has only one port. You can power the computer OR you can connect it to a peripheral. To do the initial set up, including a migration from my current laptop, it must be plugged in. It looks like it will take seven more hours to transfer the data. The screen taunts me, suggesting that it would go faster if the machine were plugged into ethernet. Y'think Apple? Might want to provide some way to support that then!

Other than the pain of this initial data transfer, though, i think the limitations will be mostly unnoticed.

I'll name this computer sassafras, thinking ahead to the plants i expect to find in our new woods.

--== ∞ ==--

In other news, Paramount is claiming copyright on the Klingon language. Ha! This is going to be fun to watch.
elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Friday, April 29th, 2016 05:56 pm
Today failed to have the focus i'd need to fight the procrastination blues. It started out well enough: the new "workflow" form to do one's self assessment leads to minimal reflection and review so i slammed that out without much thinking. (Given the imposter-syndrome-like thoughts this week, i don't know that reflection would go well.)

Next was the check-in which was tripping along until i saw a message from a colleague to our local office: a friend of mine and her co-worker had been laid off. Well, it's not quite May (our usual period for layoffs at the company) but it's pretty close. Last fall, i was planning on hanging on to life in California until this friend retired (and i would be close to completing my role as clerk within meeting).

This is another sign.

The persons i was closest to in this condo complex are gone. The used bookstore is in retreat, closing this weekend and moving somewhere with cheaper rent. Who knows what county that will be in? Our favorite pet supply store is closing. The colleague in the office who i worked most closely with is gone. And now my dear friend in the office is gone.

--== ∞ ==--

Our mortgage has been approved. I had no doubts -- i think we are buying well within our means -- but i'm not sure that is why i was underwhelmed at the news. "That's checked off," was probably my reaction. I suspect many of my emotions are not finding their way out. I suspect there's grief at leaving California. I'll probably have a few good cries in Yosemite.

And sooner or later i need to see if my camera has survived the Death Valley drop into dust and what ever was going on with the battery.
elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Wednesday, April 27th, 2016 09:36 pm
l went back & forth between feeling competent and not today.
I had a lovely lunch with J-Z, who recently retired from our office and who is also moving away from the bay area. He has a condo in Sunnyvale to sell and speculates that there are folks buying U.S. propenty to get money out of China.
After leaving the conference I called B-B.She sounds like she's feeling pretty drained. 
One thing we talked about was my networks here.Lyr's recent reflection on being known made me realize what was,., is...missing within one group. I don't feel known by them-but I do feed loved. It leaves a little gap, but it's still a wonderful gift,
14 cubic feet of books packed. Potentially 46 more to go, if we trust the moving guy's estimate.We're going tohave to pick up the pace.
elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Monday, April 25th, 2016 09:28 am

Hi [Elaine] and J---,

Lest you think I’ve forgotten . . .

I am composing a ... guide, in which I plan to address both the preparation and execution of ...data migration and authentication setup.

I would prefer (first) to put together a skeletal structure of an approach for the authentication work that a [customer] must do as part of its overall migration to [thing], and put it in the guide for your review. I find that it’s usually best to ask someone to react to something, even if that something is totally off base or misses the mark.

And so, this week, I’m planning to clear unnecessary meetings from my schedule to devote dedicated time to fleshing out the guide and its pieces/sections, including authentication. Then, I’d like to meet with you, [Elaine], to review the authentication section and proposed approach.


I reply

Oh dear, I’m at a conference most of the week. I can clear Friday (currently marked as OOO) for this. I owe you the analysis diagram. You were able to get to the excel spread sheet?

T responds

Sorry, if something I wrote suggested a meeting on Friday. I won’t set up something with you, UNTIL I have drafted an approach. Again, apologies if I misled you into a sense of crisis or urgency for this week.

I reply

You can’t see me blush. It’s guilt on my part, sorry for reacting “out loud". You certainly didn’t imply or suggest: I’ve been distracted and I have a long list of things that I feel I am behind on.

T responds

HAHAHAHAHAHA . . . it’s kind of what I figured, but didn’t want to assume that.

It’s OK, believe me.
elainegrey: Inspired by Grypping/gripping beast styles from Nordic cultures (Default)
Sunday, April 24th, 2016 10:13 pm
I hope that when we get to NC I can make learning the local-that is, HYPERLOCAL -plants a very regular part ofmy life. I dont know if I can manage a plant every day, but I should certainly manage one a week.
Tonight it is very blustery and I found this tulip poplar blossom on our evening walk.

Sent from my Sprint Samsung Galaxy Note5.