elainegrey

Not sure what yesterday's problem with the phone was that siblings couldn't hear me -- maybe wifi reception where i was sitting? as i was using the wifi and not cell signal. But i used it as the signal to buy a phone NOW and not wait to see if there's a sale in June. I didn't quite make three years with the same phone, which is disappointing.

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NY Times is full in on vaccinated people doing whatever they want,( Read more... )

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Meeting for Business yesterday, one more to go. We now have video surveillance outside of the Meeting House with hardly a moment of reflection. When i suggested holding over - we were running late, some folks hadn't heard of the cause of the surveillance -- someone shouted, "No."

This prioritization is in line with my understanding of the goals of the community -- maintaining the historic meeting house. Whether surveillance is welcoming or not part of the consideration.

Next month is my last meeting for business.

--== ∞ ==--

I spent hours after meeting for business untangling feelings about my brother's situation and my sister's judgements about my parents. I think i'm coming down with seeing a balance of happiness vs by-the-book. I hope my sister and i can have some discussions with people with experience who can help us navigate choices.

I also did a "Experiment with Light" meditation. I do need to practice to get back to a hour of silent meditation.

I eventually made it outside -- the day had been cool. I broke more ground for planting in the drive circle -- So. Much. Driveway gravel. mixed into the remarkably nice soil. I don't think it will bother the basil and ground cherries. I put in a few okra before remembering some deer do eat okra. We'll see how these plants manage.

I've a bunch of impulse purchase plants to get in, and two more trays of seedlings.

Wednesday, beginning before 4 am with discomfort throughout the day, dissolved into a long engagement with the an online game. When i was introduced to Blaseball late last week it tickled my memory, "This is mildly entertaining but what was that game...", kept up as my response until dug up Kingdom of Loathing, found my character and blasted through years of accrued gifts as i recalled how to play. Christine corrected my descriptions of both from Surrealist to Dadaist. Fandom, i am embarrassed to say to my Dreamwidth friends, is not my thing, so the engagement in Blaseball just doesn't click for me. But i've managed to completely avoid any player vs player engagement in KoL and find it a just fine diversion.

( Grousing about chronic common health issues and current flare. )

( Some financial comments )

Meanwhile, temperatures the past few nights have gotten down to 39°F. Well, it's better than the two 30°F nights around April 21st. I did get many of my okra planted Thursday night along with long neglected greens seedlings and the tromboncino squash.

I am confused by the changed CDC mask guidance for vaccinated people ( Read more... )

Lil' bits of reality intruding as my sister and i consult each other on Dad's capacity for caring for Mom. I admit to pessimism when it comes to finding people to help. Dad's planning to hire a woman who used to be a waitress at a restaurant he regularly went to. My sister's having a fit because she's not trained. I'm striving for the balance: Dad knows the woman and is confident she won't be flaky, like the first person he called. I think about the "training" i received to be a babysitter: was it really something i could have used if something happened to a kid?

I can't get as frazzled as my sister over the lack of training, especially knowing Dad has evidence of reliability in knowing her for several years. Over the fact the woman didn't have a vaccine: that was maddening.

I modeled the "I can't wait for my two weeks to pass" as part of my visit.

My sister took my mom to the art museum Wednesday, to the delight of them both. I regret the outings missed due to COVID. Would i have made the time? I hope i have learned to do so.

And to that, i need to think up some road trip for Dad, Mom, and I. I've written a mailing list query to the NC Wildflower organization.

Worked at M&D's yesterday. Despite Dad sleeping the entire time Mom was out with L, he seemed pretty drained and did not go out and mow -- his exercise and break that he's taken the last two times i was there. We visited, and discussed one of the road trip replies i got by lunch.

I've been hearing barred owls over the past week, and was happy to read that "[d]uring courtship, mated pairs perform a riotous duet of cackles, hoots, caws and gurgles."[here] That explains some of the odder sounds. I hope we can manage our four acres in such a way as to keep barred owl habitat (although i do find myself worrying a little about Marlowe outside at dusk).

Friday, after a gloomy day, the clouds cleared and a heavy Gulf coast warmth settled over the house. I mowed after work and found myself quickly exhausted.

Saturday i had tea with my sister in the mossy glade. She remembers the house as found and can marvel with me over the work we've done. She would like some of the aggressive golden rod that i need to keep from overtaking moss phlox to the north and the the slowly growing yaupon holly to the south. Hmm, maybe the left over treated lumber could work as a barrier.

I'd noticed Friday night -- the cursed stilt grass (Microstegium vimineum) has sprouted.

After lunch i tried hoeing the weeds just starting in the garden plot. Hot humid hard. I had sharpened my glorious hoe, so it sliced through the clay like a hot knife through butter. It's just REALLY HEAVY BUTTER.

( Moving plants around )Now i see why i was so spent after all that. It seemed when i came in just to be a bit of wandering around, but i guess i did do things. It was also warm and humid and i should have probably been drinking more water. I went back out after sitting and cooling off to plant the last of my Fast Lady Northern Southern Pea seeds. Since the stilt grass germinates when the soil is 55°F, and regular cowpeas are ready to go in at a soil temp of 60°F, i figured these Oregon bred cowpeas might be productive in this uncertain weather time. At this point, looks like frosts Saturday and Sunday, despite more than half the ten day forecast having highs in the 70s.

As i waited for the threatening weather, i dug more Indian strawberry out of the North berm. I remain certain i have killed my butterfly weed when i clipped the top of all the subterranean sprouts when i was shoveling off the top half inch of soil trying to do in the cursed Indian strawberry. The dogbane sprouted in the east yard this weekend, a close relative, so i will be keeping an eye on the spot. The crowns of liatris -- a purple asteraceae that grows in tall spikes -- are visibly sprouting.

Christine was in a great place during the day, good spirits. We sat on the front porch enjoying the canopy of pink flower blossoms as a storm came through for an hour.

Sunday was Quakers all morning. I was a little out of it in the afternoon (overcast, threatening, muggy): weeded the place where i will be putting in the front garden. I also sketched out where the plants will go.

Today was vaccine day, i didn't sleep so well. I feel a little out of it now. (Most of this was written on Sunday.) Our porch is just missing a few details -- almost finished ... will post photo.

Friday night i picked up dinner at the Mexican restaurant near the the big box building supply store. I was picking up the metal “rail caps” that will be installed on top of the rough cut cedar as splinter-free touch points (even though the stairs are great and I do not feel the need for a rail any more, happy happy happy dance), so ordering take out seemed a fun idea. The parking lot for the restaurant was full on a Friday night. Inside tables were full of people, multiple families with children at one table, a party of six men waiting for a table while I waited for food.

I didn't feel anxiety but i was very aware of high risk space i was in. I wasn't happy about it and won't pick up food from there again. At least the space had a very high ceiling.

The good news is that the county's level has dropped to the middle level assessment at the NYTimes, high instead of very high, so that's reassuring.

--== ∞ ==--

Saturday and Sunday were mostly about digging in the garden and then being an achy creaky thing.

Yesterday i saw my first tiny bluet (Houstonia pusilla). I've seen them in mid February, in previous years. It does seem that while this winter hasn't been dramatic this year -- we missed the cold snap -- it's been more sustained.

I was feeling under the weather yesterday -- have had a headache since Saturday -- but i managed to remember that Thursday evening was the state announcement of dose distribution day. I checked the UNC health system website after 5 pm and there were appointments in Smithfield and Rocky Mount today. As i selected them, they evaporated away -- but i got the last one for Mom. So Mom is off for her vaccine with Dad today. Huzzah.

Christine and I took a home coronavirus test yesterday. ( For no rational reason. )

I'd arranged for UPS to pick up the tests, but they didn't. We'll see if they do this morning, and if the samples are good enough. I almost hope that the samples aren't so we get new kits that we can wait to use until we are really worried. (The kits do arrive pretty quickly on ordering them.)

We had snow in the full moonlight on Thursday morning -- at least on the south (cooler) side of our house. The north side, which gets plenty of winter sun, was mostly melted by 8 am.

My grandmother turns 103 on Monday. I'm sending pastries from a Cuban bakery in Miami. I hope the guava takes her back to her child hood in the Bahamas. She's apparently fading. We'll be gathering with her by Zoom. If it works well, i think i'll try to set my Dad up with an account or scheduled meetings so he can Zoom with her a little more frequently.

Feeling exhausted from so many feelings.

I talked to my sister about getting between Christine and her sister. I got some support even though we agreed i made a mistake. ( ruminate )

I arrived at my folks to find Bourne Ultimatum playing even louder than usual (turns out the movie has quite the dynamic range, so if Mom was going to hear the dialogue, all the shooting was painfully loud). Dad was a bundle of nerves before driving to Goldsboro for his vaccine. We did a little zoom training, he ate lunch - biting his cheek several times, and then off he went.

Mom wanted ... to continue watching Bourne Ultimatum??!! Well, OK then. After that she wanted to watch "the government" so we watched the reivew of the troops, the laying of the wreath at Arlington and the motorcade back, and parts of "Parade Across America," which had me tearing up frequently. Somewhere in there, she actually asked me to take her to the bathroom, a huge thing as i usually get treated like a guest and mom hides her bodily needs. Was it because she thought Dad had gone to Florida and not just for an afternoon errand? Is it the dementia removing a little more inhibition? I still celebrate. And then there was the amusing moment when Mom got us moving with some urgency, and after some struggles at communication, i realized she was asking for her glass of wine. Like a cat with a finely tuned internal clock: bam, 4 pm, need glass of wine. Dad came home, all well.

Christine connected with her sister, and there were some miscommunications cleared up.

My sister called twice to explain she wasn't coming over to exercise Mom. Something was wrong -- i felt an edge at her voice that i've heard when she's had to deal with dead or dying chickens or dogs or cats -- but "all was OK." I assumed there was something like toilets backed up. I was wrong. Later my sister let me know about some of the elephants in her room, that i hadn't observed myself. I'm so sad that she's got this to deal with, and i'm glad i can be near if she needs me. Stupid pandemic. ( more rumination )

As i was reflecting on how Chatham county's COVID cases per capita is larger than Santa Clara county's, i found myself wondering about the population size. Is the county here about the same size as Mountain View, CA? It's a little smaller than Mountain View, CA and a little larger than Palo Alto, CA.
( covid )

I have been struggling with to do lists.

This morning i saw a bright satellite in conjunction with Castor and Pollux cruising through the early dawn sky. It was as bright as Castor and Pollux (between magnitudes 1 and 2). SL-24 DEB was the best match for track and time, a Russian object of unknown categorization, with a maximum brightness of 3.4. The track ran closer to Castor and Pollux than the prediction draws -- but it's the best match. I may write to http://www.satobs.org/seesat/seesatindex.html

Except, pfft, to do list.

I'm not sure why the steps project has frozen up for me. I am the block right now.

I took Friday off and frittered it away: 50% of my reason for taking it off was to deal with finding a carpenter, etc. Admittedly the frittering included lots of shopping for gifts, including trying to figure out appropriate books to help get my freshman nephew using Jupyter notebooks. Which -- it seems like it's going to be so easy with Anaconda, the scientific python package. Install that great huge thing (i should probably bring it over on a thumb drive giving their satellite connection), and i won't have to coach him on the command line if you doesn't want to. I trust that if this is a direction he should go, the limitations of notebooks will soon push him there. The gaol is to give him a playground that will inspire.

I'd already picked out a pastry chef book for my niece who is far more inspired in that direction.

Another fritter trigger is that both Christine and i are moping around with small coughs and malaise. No fever, good oxygen saturation: presuming it's not COVID-19. Nonetheless, i am not going to my parents. We have tried to ask the woman who comes twice a week to add the COVID tracker to her phone: she's not interested. She's "Double masking" in public, whatever that means. She takes cash only and has made negative noises about vaccines. We teeter at the edge of being done with her. She's cisgender, white, presumably hetero due to ex-husband in history: i tend to suspect we are of different political outlooks. All this OK without a pandemic, but handling cash was suspect early on. She was pretty confident in her essential worker status and chafed against the spring shut down even though we kept paying her (cash, sigh). We gave her Thanksgiving off (paid), partly due to worry about the surging rates. She comes today. We'll open windows.

I joined Christine & Carrie for a walk Friday night to the nearby dirt road that goes to the Zen center and we encountered a woman walking her English shepherd (related to border collie) off leash and training the dog. We were happy to be a teachable moment for Harlan, and i was happy when Carrie demonstrated her lack of interest in treats: part of the challenge in training her. In trying to explain where we lived, Christine finally said, "We're the house with the Black Lives Matter sign." Our interlocutor immediately went to the fact that the Zen Center probably wouldn't want to put a BLM sign at the road because of vandalism concerns: just being "Zen" was triggering enough, apparently, for the leap of "Not Christian, therefore Satanist." On one hand i was assured that Christine's and my wariness in decision making was not an outlier. And we were glad to say that we haven't had any particular trouble: the trash rate seems the same, perhaps more sign adjacent now instead of sprinkled down the frontage. She gossiped a little about the reactionary barber on the corner, of whom we'd heard from my father, and who had a 2016 Trump sign up for years and a Thank Jesus yard signs up as long as we have been here.

I've been reading your posts while curled up under the blanket on my phone. It's not conducive to leaving comments.

I'm making pie crust from scratch and have tried to mise en place: i somehow left out 20% of the flour needed in the crust. Fortunately i was blind baking the shell yesterday and not planning on doing the pie until today. The crust went into the oven -- fortunately i hadn't bothered to make a beautiful crimp -- and came out half way through the baking completely slumped down the sides with pools of melted butter at the bottom. After realizing i'd measured two cups not two and a half cups of flour a couple days ago, i sprinkled flour in the pools of melted butter, hoping it will be not terrible. I'm worried that, while gorgeous looking as flaky crust, the crust is actually some tough polymer that will break teeth.

At least a nice juicy apple pie will be baking on that surface and maybe will balance out infelicities -- but what about the top? So, this morning i took my already rolled out sheet. I painted half with ice water, and sprinkled some flour on that. Folded. Paint half with water, sprinkle flour, fold. I think i made three folds and then tried to carefully shape it into an Echo Dot sized lump. I rolled it out again between parchment paper (A++ technique! Would recommend. Start rolling from the middle) and put it back in the fridge for a bit. Hopefully, the fact that i had shredded the butter and barely worked the dough originally will mean the gluten development stays low.

I remember making croissants my senior year of high school and the constant return of the dough to the freezer to try and make the layers. Have i made croissant crust?

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So -- i had about 40% more apples than could fit in the crust, even carefully fitting the slices in a spiral so it would be packed full. So i made a second pie with a Pillsbury crust from the freezer. I really don't understand why there was too many apples. I weighed the apples! I dunno. Anyhow, two pies isn't bad.

The home made crust pie came out with apple juices bubbling around between pie pan and crust. We'll see how crisp that turns out. The second pie i didn't want to bother with blind baking the bottom and discovered i'd preheated the oven with a pizza stone in it. A quick check of the internet hinted that putting the pie on the stone was particularly useful with pies where one risks a soggy bottom. Great! And it looks pretty good, so that's nice. Now i have to WAAAAIIIITTTT to taste how it all turned out.

We are meeting up with my sister's family and my parents for an out door pie eating on this somewhat gloomy day in a few hours.

--== ∞ ==--

In other news, watching Fellowship of the Ring with Christine and finding myself more picky about special effects.

After finding out about the three color code for our counties in North Carolina, we received emergency messages on our cell phones to alert us that the county is now "orange." Oh well, it was nice to feel that things might not be that terrible for a few days.



* Christine sat with me as i watched four of five YouTube videos on rolling out dough. One chef advised a hockey puck shape and size. Christine repeated back the instruction replacing the comparison with an Echo Dot. I nodded, i'd understand THAT instruction but needed the video to explain what a hockey puck size was. "The Echo Dot is Amazon's diminutive, hockey puck-sized Alexa device." "I opted for the Echo “Dot” which, being from North Dakota, I can say looks very similar to a hockey puck with cool “Tron” lights ..." We, being from North Carolina, have far more experience with the Echo Dot we got a year ago than with hockey pucks.